Imploding Star: Leah's Story
by Too Far Gone-Never Coming Back
Summary: This is Leah's story of what happened after Sam imprinted on Emily. It's set before Bella comes to Forks, in Leah's freshmen year, 2003, when the Cullens move there.
1. Thinking

_Disclaimer: I, unfortunately, do not own these characters. I don't really own anyone, since, it's, you know, against the law. I own a dog though, two dogs, actually. And my sister owns a virtual cat, but she's allergic so we don't have a real one. Well, no, that's not true, her virtual cat died after I stuffed in the back of her pajama drawer so that I couldn't hear the annoying beeps anymore. And I did make up some of Leah's friends._

_I know Leah's not really nice, but I still wonder what she's thinking. So, I'm definitely not the first one to do this, but here's Leah's story, how I see it._

Thinking

"I'm sorry, Leah." Emily tried to soothe me, but it wasn't helping my involuntary tears. I had tried to be silent and stop crying, but the tears just kept running and to stifle my sobs I had to stop breathing. It didn't seem like such a bad idea, actually. I could hear Heather's voice in my ear, though, and it changed my mind. _I think I'll play the suffocation game tonight, _she had said. I hadn't thought she was serious, and by the time I realized she was, she was gone, forever, my best friend. Not my _best _friend, that was Emily, but Heather was close.

Now I had lost two people, Heather and Sam. Sam wasn't dead, not like Heather, but he didn't love me anymore, which was just as bad. That's exactly why, this once, Emily couldn't comfort me. Sam loved _her, _and she had said it was unrequited, but I'd seen the way she looked at him. I wasn't exactly _mad _at Emily. I had a hard time holding a grudge against her. And anyway, she had chosen to pretend she didn't love him for my sake, that balanced some of the anger I felt for her.

Eventually, my eyes dried out. No more tears would come. Emily had gone to eat, but I wasn't really hungry. I didn't feel like I had a stomach to put food in. I hadn't really eaten anything lately. I'd been thinking things through. My parents hadn't understood my need to lay on my bed and just cry, but Emily had. And it hadn't been hard to get Seth to leave me alone. I supposed I could go eat now, try to act normal, but did I have a reason?

For Emily. For Emily I would go eat something. It would make her happy. I might be able to tease Seth some, too, if I tried really hard. That would make Emily happy, she'd be glad to see me acting normal again. So, I forced my limp body off of my bed. There was a deep imprint of me and a more shallow one of Emily's arm in the comforter. I hastily smoothed it out, hoping to erase all of those memories. I once again considered the possibility of becoming an entirely different person, maybe just forgetting all my time with, I cringed at the name, _Sam. _

Walking out of my room, I called, "What's for lunch?" Mom, Dad, and Seth were sitting at our small table playing Monopoly. They all looked up when I came in. Dad stiffened and Seth looked afraid. I wasn't expecting my mom's reaction. She stood up and grabbed a paper plate.

"Hot dogs and macaroni." she flung the plate like a frisbee and I almost dropped it. I got a cup from the cabinet and poured some lemonade. I took heaping servings of macaroni, but only half of a hot dog. I sat down at the empty seat at the table. Seth watched me carefully as I took a bite of macaroni, his mouth slightly open.

Mom sat down next to me as I asked, "Where's Emily?" Mom froze for a brief second before grabbing the dice Dad held out to her. "Mom? Where'd she go?" Was she angry with me? Was she upset that I still loved Sam?

"She went to the beach. With Rebecca, Billy Black's kid? She's home for the weekend." she was smiling slightly and it looked wrong. Rebecca couldn't be home, she hadn't been planning to come home for another month. I ate in silence. Seth was winning the Monopoly game, but he didn't seem to notice. He was still staring at me. This had been a wasted effort. Emily wasn't even here to see my show. "Seth? Seth, it's your turn to roll." Seth's eyes snapped over to Mom.

"Sorry, spaced out." he muttered. He looked like he was paying attention to the game, but I could see his eyes flicker over to me.

"I'm going to the beach." I announced. I grabbed my jacket and slammed the door on my way out. Because I knew Emily wouldn't be there. I knew my mom had been lying.

* * *

I walked down the beach feeling utterly stupid. Why had I come here? Where memories lingered? This had _not _been part of the new person deal, subconscious! I didn't agree to forget that fast! I'd never be able to forget, but I could try. And if I tried hard enough, I'd be able to ignore it. Eventually.

I swore and threw some rocks into the water. Eventually wasn't soon enough. "Leah!" Wendy called to me from down the beach. "Leah, what the effing hell are you doing out here? It's freezing!" Wendy was huddled into two jackets, her arms wrapped around herself. Kynda was standing next to her in a big winter coat. I hadn't really noticed the cold. It felt just fine out to me. I mean, it was raining, but it was always raining. I shrugged. They were walking towards me.

"'S'not that cold." I muttered. They had reached me by now. Kynda laughed. We stared at her like we always do when she acts weird. All the time.

"What? You said...snot." she cracked up again.

"Shut up, retard." Wendy whacked her upside the head. I smiled, slightly. It was good to be with my friends, even if Emily wasn't here. I hadn't seen them for two days. We'd had Friday off and I'd been home all of yesterday. "You want one of Kynda's coats?" Wendy asked.

"Coats? Plural?" I asked. Kynda opened her coat to reveal 3 unzipped jackets beneath. I laughed. "No thanks, I'm good." Wendy glanced at my jacket accusingly and I looked down too. My jacket was worn thin, very dirty, and it had multiple holes in the selves and on the back. "Okay, my jacket isn't in the best condition, but I'm not cold." Wendy laid a hand on my forehead.

"You aren't fever-warm, but you're warmer than me." she said. Kynda placed her hand on Wendy's forehead. I put one hand on Kynda's forehead and the other on Wendy's.

"You're both freezing!" They _were _cold, freezing was blowing it a bit out of proportion, but they were still cold. Wendy gave me a smug smile.

"What'd I tell you?" she asked.


	2. Scars

_Disclaimer: La-di-da! Everyone knows what this is for, right? Just checking. If you want an actual disclaimer, go back a chapter._

_Well, we've all gotten a look inside Leah's head via Jacob and It's getting a little harder for me to write from her perspective._

Scars

My eyes widened as I took in the long scars distorting her face. "E--" I choked out. I closed my eyes and took a deep breath before opening them again. "Em?" I said in a small voice. She couldn't move, the hospital had hooked her up to an IV for pain medication. "Emily? What...what happened?" I directed the last part towards my mother, who was sitting in a chair on the other side of the room.

"Bear." was all my mother said. I raised my eyebrows.

"Bear? Bear! That's it? What about a bear?" I demanded angrily as the doctor walked in.

"Is...is everything okay here?" he asked. I turned to give him my best glare, the one Seth had always said was like a serial killer's. "Hello, you must be...Leah, right? Your mother said she'd be contacting you. I'm Dr. McEvans." He held out his hand. As I took it, I could see his tag reading, _Evan McEvans _and I couldn't suppress my giggle. I quickly withdrew my hand and cleared my throat, my face slipping back into a glare. I saw on his tag that he was only a year older than me and wondered if he was some sort of intern. "Your, cousin?" he didn't wait for a response. "She was...er..." he shrunk back slightly, as if afraid of my reaction. "attacked." he said finally. I bit my lip trying not to speak, but it was a wasted effort.

"Emily? Emily was attacked by a bear?" I was practically screaming, but I couldn't managed to keep my voice down. "Why was she near the bear anyway?" I couldn't make sense of my thoughts, so before Evan could answer I was asking my mother, "Isn't Emily allergic to bears? Shouldn't she be dead?" My mom didn't respond for a moment, probably thinking I'd just continue yelling.

"That's...bees, Leah." She choked out probably sensing I was truly wanting an answer.

"And, she _would _be dead if she hadn't gotten here so fast." Dr. McEvans said reassuringly.

"_WHAT?"_ I exploded. How was _that _supposed to make me feel better? "She's almost dead?!"

"No, no, that's not what I said!" he blabbered. "Another few hours and she would have lost an awful lot of blood. She has Von Willenbrand's. You see, she couldn't have healed this much by now without medication to activate her platelets. And...Leah?" He stopped his rambling as I broke into sobs. "Leah...she'll be just fine. She might have a few scars, but she'll be okay."

"Calm down, Leah." I could hear both his and my mother's voices but only distantly. Like through a long tunnel. Mom had her arm around my shoulders, trying to calm me.

It was all fading away from my awareness.

"Ugh...L-Leah?"

Noise.

Pain.

Relief.

Panic.

Anger.

Curiosity.

Darkness.

* * *

"Do you think she's okay? Did she hit her head on anything?" _Yeah, _the floor_, thanks for asking._ Wait. Who _was _asking?

"Emily?" I asked groggily. At least one distinct gasp ensured me I was heard.

"You're awake!" she exclaimed. I opened my eyes and my mom pulled me into a hug.

"Oh, now that your up, do you mind if I go get Seth to see Emily?" my mom asked hurriedly. I mumbled "go" convincingly enough and dragged myself over to a chair. As soon as Evan left the room I turned on Emily.

"Why the heck did you go near a bear?" I shouted at her. She flinched and I softened my voice, "I'm sorry, but why would you be within a mile radius of a bear in the first place?"

"That-- That's not your business Leah." It was the first time Emily had said _anything _like that to me. My jaw sagged and I just stared at her for a moment.

"Of course it's my freaking business!" I exploded, then immediately felt bad. "No, if you don't want me to know, then I won't ask." Emily stared at me in disbelief.

"Are you developing symptoms of bipolarity?" she asked. I burst into laughter, just because it felt good to hear her joke again. Em laughed with me for a few minutes.

"Now, where were you on the day of...today, when you were attacked by a bear?" I asked with one eyebrow raised.

"By the river. Same place as the bear. He committed the crime. Go interrogate him." She trailed off.

"Em, why were you by the river?" I asked, truly interested.

"It's a good place to think, and the water was cool." She wiggled her feet and I understood she had been in the water. We were quiet for a moment, then Emily's soft snoring filled the room. I stared at the scars again, trying to see them as if they weren't there. Or rather as if they'd always been there. Because they probably wouldn't go away. Half of her face smiled in her sleep, it was the same smile she'd had since we were little. As long as I could remember that'd been her smile, but the other half had smiled, too.

I closed my eyes against the memories. I had to think of her this way now, without remembering that the scars had never been there before. That way we could go along as we always had. Best friends ignored faults, so I could ignore scars.

"Oh, Emily! Oh, Emily I am so, so _very _sorry!" I opened my eyes against my will. I didn't want to hear that voice. It shouldn't be here. More importantly, why would the voice be _sorry._

"What did you do to her?" I snapped at Sam, it didn't hurt nearly as much when I was just angry with him.

"I- I didn't do an- anything, Leah. But... but that b- beer, I m- mean, bear!" His face was green and he was trying to talk so fast that he kept stumbling over the words. "The bear, the scars! What if she doesn't heal?" he looked really truly upset about it, so I just let him go on with his fit for a while, giving him cold glares that he didn't seem to notice. The only time I got up was when he started to puke. I got the trash can from the side of the room and called a nurse for some Tylenol or something. It took Sam 4 times to keep down the pill and 3 to keep down the water. Eventually he was just laying in a chair shaking under a blanket. The nurse tried to take his temperature but every time she got near him with the thermometer he tried to run full speed away from it, she gave up.

"Uh, Mr..." the nurse began.

"Sam Uley." I provided when Sam just pressed his lips together and shivered.

"Mr. Uley, if this is really upsetting you to be here, I'd suggest you go home now." she turned and started to leave. She stopped at the door like she had been expecting him to follow. Maybe she had. "Mr. Uley?"

"No." Sam sat up in the chair slowly. She raised her eyebrows at him. "I'm not leaving." he picked up the remote and turned on the TV. The nurse shrugged at me and left. "Thanks." Sam muttered to me. I ignored him.

_Ha. And I thought I wouldn't be able to finish that last part. I did it in less than ten minutes. I wonder why the rest was so hard to write..._

_Anyway, please review and I'll try to update sooner next time._


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